A Halesowen Ho Ho Ho!

Christmas is an important time for the Hub Marketing Board as there are certain rituals that must be rolled out every December. Halesowen is therefore placed on red alert for chart rundowns, calendar revelations and guest appearances from our ancient founding father - if only the weather would behave itself...

- D9 Grinch drives the 4H -

Friday 20th December 2019 and it's absolutely bucketing down as Secretary WME makes his way to West Bromwich on the newly-extended Midland Metro; services are now running through beyond Grand Central to Birmingham Library for Centenary Square. The Chairman is fashionably late for our rendezvous and therefore gets punished with driving duties on the 4H, wearing his Bah Humbug hat for the occasion. Endless congestion through Oldbury and Blackheath means it takes an eternity to reach Hasbury where we can finally home in on our opening drink of the day.

- Hunting an escape from the rain -

That first tipple comes courtesy of the Crafty Pint, a micropub on Wassell Road that's housed in a former pet shop. Plum Porter meets Oakham Inferno here as we dry out awhile before braving the rain again during a soggy Albert Road ferret. The walk allows DJ 'Hubbacini' to commence the silly song chart countdown with reference to Wombles, Galloping Majors and the Yellow Rose of Texas. The playlist continues unabated in the Hunting Tree, a pub whose grand townhouse appearance doesn't quite match a plain interior. To the warblings of Arthur Mullard and Hylda Baker, we complete the year's dartboard duellings as WME Whirlwind is crowned 2019 Pub Games Champion.

- San Miguel in the S Bar -

Three quick ticks in Halesowen town centre now await of which Picks makes the best impression, positioned on the pedestrianised section of the High Street and serving up a nice drop of Enville Ale to go with our calendar unveiling. Oscars and the S Bar meanwhile are run-of-the-mill shopfront conversions three doors apart from each other; Oscars is the livelier of the two whereas the S Bar has had delivery problems, hence we resort to having a bottle of San Miguel each given the absence of any draught offerings. In between times, 'Hubbacini' declares that Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's classic hit 'Goodbye-ee' is our number one song of the year although special mention is reserved for our unique rendition of Spanish Eyes that reverberated around the Potteries back in September. 

- Hawne Happenings -

The miserable weather is rather ruining any prospect of extended exploration so it's best for us to stay indoors - more pubs anyone? Switching our focus towards Short Cross, we pitch into the lovely Hawne Tavern for a memorable encounter with a Honey Blonde (Downton Brewery's straw-toned bitter, presented in superb condition). We note also the Whitley - a Black Country Ales establishment on the main road - and the Little Chop House (ex-Mad O'Rourke's) as we convey ourselves to Cradley, the Chairman almost throwing his prized calendar under the bus amidst all the excitement!

- Labouring through the nominations? -

If Mr D9 had written a wishlist to Santa, the Why Not near Colley Gate would probably have been somewhere close to the top. It's essential for us to cash in this bona fide Black Country classic, popping in for a tasty slurp of Hartlebury's Off the Rails - nice! We are then summoned to the Wilson Hall by Charles Pemberton Rowbottom III, freshly exhumed from Market Drayton in readiness for the 2019 Hub Awards presentation. Armed with some house bitter and soaking up the Labour Club surroundings, our hub forefather announces the best Trip (Redditch), Discount (Rock Steady Eddie's) and Pub (Woodrow) nominees in bringing board business to a close for another year. The mayhem should hopefully resume early in 2020, and in the meantime... Merry Christmas!