Monday, May 23

Hub Marketing 2016: West Bromwich and Bilston

A half day helping of hub happenings here as the Chairman and the Secretary join forces for a doorstep challenge with an added element of cold case investigation...

- CSI West Bromwich boldly baldly on the case... -
Donning gumshoe garb we meet at Dartmouth Street tram stop to commence our detective duty, whereby D9 has got wind of an unsolved murder dating back to 1961. We therefore stake out the crime scene near Bratt Street hoping for leads whilst trying to pinpoint the former locations of Christ Church and some tennis courts. Sadly there aren't any new clues to be found although we do note the pending demolition of a fire-damaged town house just across from the former Labour Club.

- Tantany Lane -
We clearly aren't cut out for cold case contemplation so a forensic ferret will have to suffice instead. The backstreets of Tantany are beckoning as we pass West Bromwich Baptist Church and Hargate Primary School before uncovering the town's fire and ambulance stations. Detective Superintendent D9 is then distraught to find the Hargate Arms seemingly closed (for good?) - he has fond memories of the place from his early days on the beer beat.

- Lyne Purl Penalty Notice -
To Lyndon next and a chance encounter with hidden history when we find the Lyne Purl Well perched upon the pavement - this was once the primary source of clean water for the locality but has been out of use for 20 years or more, hence the ceremonial lion's mouth now runs dry. The well was an excellent discovery but the same cannot be said of D9's next piece of evidence, a penalty notice packet that he probably could have done with in Ellesmere. Thankfully the Chairman is not liable for any fines today so it's the Secretary on call for the cobs and ale in the Horse & Jockey, Mr WME being only too happy to pay out for £1.50 pints of Ringwood Fortyniner - a definite discount deal!

- WME wins in the Globe -
D9 did get his own back by winning the first two legs of darts, then our customary exchange of silly songs has Kenneth Cope uttering 'Hands off stop mucking about' in reply to a 'Frontier Psychiatrist' - how's that for an frankly frightening combination! Decamping to the Globe sees normal sporting service resumed, WME Whirlwind finding form with the aid of Thornbridge Jaipur and some stellar checkouts (85 and 52 chief among them). A 0-2 deficit becomes a 5-2 lead in barely the blink of a pub cat's eye.

- Tesco Trolley Time -
For some bizarre and devilish reason the Chairman was now most insistent that the Secretary should experience the full authentic West Bromwich 'treatment', warts and all. WME's misgivings about what such an education would involve were not remotely allayed when an unnerving concrete car park suddenly appeared on our agenda; apparently this multi-storey masterpiece is due to be consigned to history before too long, hence D9's keenness to milk it for vintage trolley park pictures.

- Metro Moments -
Escaping back into normal daylight, we weave a trail to the Vine on Roebuck Street, pausing momentarily to account for the Olde Wine Shoppe along the way. The Vine is well known for its Indian cuisine and indoor barbecue but we somehow manage to resist the lure of the curry in favour of some enjoyable Holden's Golden Glow. Kenrick Park Metro awaits in the shadow of some distinctive blue tower blocks, then we ride to The Crescent in advance of some Bilston doorstep canvassing.

- A new recruit in the Happy Wanderer? -
To Stowlawn where Green Lanes offers up bus stop flags and a cemetery closet to keep the D9 out of mischief, that is until we reach the Happy Wanderer where a certain barside mannequin soon caught his eye. With our new acquaintance watching on we play out our darting denouement, WME Whirlwind just about clinging on for a 7-6 triumph that was too close for comfort. A couple of Bilston homages are required in the vicinity of Prouds Lane; the Villiers Arms has been converted into flats while the town's former swimming baths have been flattened now that the Bert Williams Leisure Centre is in full swing.

- Woody's Bar -
Bilston town centre provides the final action from this perilous plot. Woody's Bar definitely merits a visit, adjoining the Robin 2 club and paying affectionate tribute to Midlands musical legend Roy Wood of Wizzard and the Move fame. D9's dive radar is attuned to both the Dog & Partridge and the Horse & Jockey; a swift half in the latter involves enduring the resident karaoke queen's rendition of the Eurythmics 'Thorn in my side' (hastily re-titled 'Pain in my ears') before sanity is restored courtesy of a Purple Moose in the Cafe Metro... and that's that, case closed. 
Was that another excellent Hub Marketing excursion? Guilty as charged.
Appropriate sentence = more of the same coming soon!

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