- Station Starkness -
Burton of course is a place renowned for its brewing heritage so Board Members brace themselves for a beer bonanza when catching the 11:19 Nottingham train up from Birmingham New Street. The journey takes a shade under half an hour before we alight to savour the undoubted ugliness of Burton railway station, the functional flat frontage of which really does not do the town justice.
- Brewery Infrastructure -
It's difficult to avoid evidence of Burton's principal industry as bits of brewery seem to be everywhere. For example, Station Street offers glimpses of the extensive Molsen Coors plant with its metallic towers and concrete footbridge forming the backdrop to a belated breakfast at Rumble Tums Cafe. Our Full Montys here come complete with a "Hello duck" greeting straight out of the East Midlands phrasebook, then just around the corner on Cross Street is the wonderful Coopers Tavern with its array of Joules and Bass memorabilia.
- Stapenhill Cemetery Closet -
Fortified by some No. 6 Winter Warmer ale, we breeze along Burton High Street then cross the stately Trent Bridge to explore the other side of the river. The community of Stapenhill clings to the opposite bank as we swiftly get stuck into some prime exploration. Stapenhill Cemetery offers a treat for the Chairman when we discover a closet within the bowels of a chapel building (Mr D9 hopes that his blast on the hand drier didn't disrupt a funeral service too much), while the neighbouring Elms Inn has some evocative painted Bass signage to accompany a draught pint of Burton's most famous brew.
- The Stapenhill Swan -
Further Stapenhill landmarks include St Peter's Church (standing on high above the river) and the parklands of Stapenhill Gardens where a large swan sculpture is considerably less vicious than its real life counterparts - perhaps it was the sight of the bald spot that started them hissing? Mr D9 racks his brains trying to remember a village near Drakelow Power Station that he once drove around, whereas the Secretary is busy spotting a couple of pubs ahead on Main Street - the Barley and the New Inn.
- Secretary meets Snowman -
The second of those pubs provides the setting for the day's darts as a giant inflatable snowman referees over the now-inevitable WME Whirlwind victory. We're not sure if Frosty is partial to a drop of Marston's Pedigree but he did a good job of keeping score and making sure that D9 Destroyer did not overstep the oche. The Secretary is now 99% assured of retaining his Hub Games Champion of the Year title barring a minor miracle taking place during our awards presentation trip later this month.
- Baldness on Baron Burton's Bridge -
Stapenhill and Burton were once connected by a passenger ferry boat service which was replaced in 1889 by the construction of Ferry Bridge, an elegant semi-suspended structure that was gifted to the town by Michael Arthur Bass (Baron Burton). The bridge has been subject to a recent refurbishment project and was ceremonially reopened a few weeks ago (Friday 21st October to be precise) following a year-long closure - it's fair to say the bald spot was impressed by the end result!
- Burton Bridge Inn -
Ferry Bridge links us neatly to Lichfield Street where the Leopard has a rather fine facade that includes some impressive carved lettering for Charrington's Fine Ales. Just down the road is the Dog Inn, one of the newer additions to the Black Country Ales estate where the Bosun's Mocha Stout is very much to the Secretary's taste. The Fuggle & Nugget is of interest as an example of the micropub trend (the Ashover Milk Stout here also rates highly), but it's the Burton Bridge Inn that steals the show with some Bramble Stout, an inquisitive dog and a whopping great chimney breast which divides the cosy bar in two.
- A Burton Bah Humbug! -
Passing the National Brewery Centre (where D9 spies a cast iron urinal on the courtyard), we take Horninglow Street over the railway to reach our final trio of taverns. The Derby Inn is on the main Derby Road towards the edge of town; some Timothy Taylor's Boltmaker is a nice tipple here as we make the acquaintance of our second dog in quick succession. The Loaf & Cheese then bestows us with more Draught Bass before a closing Pedigree call at the Duke of York, a backstreet corner local tucked away among the terraces of Victoria Street. Despite the presence of a Bah Humbug hat there is no sign of any scrooge-like behaviour and the train journey home is a very happy one indeed. Cheers!
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