Sunday, November 20

Coventry Quiffs 2022: Coundon Calling!

P-P-P-Pick up a Penguin! Welcome to the Hub Marketing Board's annual Coventry jolly, which this year should dovetail nicely with some Brum-based penguin spotting. All of your favourite features should be on the agenda - quiffs, rock and roll singalongs, general daftness - so let the fun commence... 

- The Road To Giverny -
It's Trip Log: Friday 18th November 2022 as the Chairman and the Secretary meet in Brum where - following on from last year's successful Snowman-themed event - a new festive art trail has recently been installed, this time presenting a parade of penguins. 15 such sculptures have been dotted around the city centre so we quickly make the acquaintance of 'Tiffany' (in New Street Station), 'In the Bleak Midwinter' (along Piccadilly Arcade) and 'The Road to Giverny' (on Corporation Street). The latter design takes inspiration from the 1885 Monet painting of the same name by presenting a classic winterscape of bare-twigged branches. 

- Kevin the Kinguin -
More penguins await at Cathedral Square (for the fairground fun of 'Helter Skelter'), Church Street ('The Forest at Christmas', complete with a reindeer face) and inside the elegant Great Western Arcade, the chosen home of 'Kevin the Kinguin' with his blue kingfisher plumage. The Frankfurt Christmas Market is getting into full swing over by the Council House so we weave our way through the bratwurst-wielding kiosks to find 'Santa Paws', featuring an array of pets dressed up in yuletide attire - let's just say the cat elves look distinctly unimpressed by their given costumes. Victoria Square also features a traditional nativity scene although Chairman D9's attempt to disguise himself as Mrs Claus quickly gets rumbled!

- Spotted in the Hill Street Subway -
Pleased with our attempts at Penguin Patrol, we catch the 10:33 London Northwestern train bound for Euston and reach Coventry by 11 o'clock. First up here is a Ring Road rummage detecting elements of 1960s town planning; Coventry has done much to bring itself into the 21st century in recent years but there are still fragments of the post-war rebuild for Mr D9 to get excited about, especially Hill Street subway with its brightly-coloured mosaic tiles. Our ferret then covers a stretch of Coundon Road, passing Bablake School and the former site of a railway station which closed under the Beeching Cuts - the associated signal box survived until 2014 and the level crossing barriers are now automated. 

- Rialto Plaza -
Coundon originally started out as a small Warwickshire village which got swallowed up by Coventry's suburban expansion during the 1930s, although it is still an area with plenty of photographic interest. A clutch of shops are arranged around the junction of Barker Butts Lane and Moseley Avenue while the Rialto Plaza complex currently operates as a function suite but previously served as a bingo hall and cinema. Nearby, Crampers Field supplies our breakfast location when Joy's Cafe delivers everything we could wish for in terms of a greasy spoon. Friendly service, vintage coffee mugs and absolutely stonking fried bread - yes please!

- Coundon Community Hub -
£6.99 for a Joy's regular breakfast was money well spent and we're all set up for the rest of the day. A quick peek at Coundon Library (a branch that continues to look resolutely shed-like) precedes a photocall at the local community hub - Chairman D9 always takes his promotional duties most seriously indeed, as you well know. More of Moseley Avenue leads directly to our first tipple of the trip which arrives courtesy of the Holyhead, an Ember Inns establishment on the main A4114 Holyhead Road. Being mindful not to stoke up any gourmet gas, we stick to halves of St Austell's Proper Job and perch by the quiz machines during the lunchtime dining rush - the pensioners are out in force it seems, keeping the barstaff constantly occupied. 

- Quiffed Darts in the New Spires -
Our visit to the Holyhead is bookended by the day's silly song selection, which pitches D9's choice of 'Fat' by Weird Al Yankovic (parodying Michael Jackson's 'Bad') against Tommy Bruce and the tongue-in-cheek 'Buttons and Bows'. Heading towards Chapelfields, the Chairman chooses Allesley Old Road as the setting for unveiling his 2022 quiff masterpiece, a hefty item of headgear fashioned from crumpled black paper - the residents are aghast at his Eddie Cochran impressions with one old dear instantly closing her curtains in protest! Luckily the quiff gets a warmer reception at the New Spires on Grayswood Avenue and we can take to the oche watched on by an Eric Bristow mural. WME Whirlwind channels the Crafty Cockney's presence en route to a 3-2 victory, once he'd found his scoring range that is...

- Secretary WME blends in with the blinds -
Our afternoon agenda is dedicated to Allesley Park, a sprawling estate to the west of the city centre. The number 8 bus connects us to Winsford Avenue, noting the Westmede shopping precinct and a modern neighbourhood centre (doctors, pharmacy, community library, that kind of thing). The Secretary's prior planning pays off when a shortcut brings us to the Minstrel Boy bang on 4pm, albeit the pub's opening hours have increased so we could have come earlier all along. The barmaid seems delighted to recognise our Black Country accents - definitely not Brummie!! - and we partake of refreshing Carlings in a refurbished lounge where the decor matches the colour of Mr WME's fleece. We do love our run-of-the-mill box boozers and the Minstrel Boy was well worth seeking out.

- Something Sour in the Dig Brew Beer Club -
Evening entails a Coventry conclusion back across Coundon way, Flannelly's Irish bar on the Holyhead Road being a happy accident of a discovery that wasn't really on our radar. The Guinness is good and our Gary Wood mascot tries the quiff for size and almost vanishes. At the Secretary's request, there's a Hops d'Amour micropub pit stop to sample delectable cask ale (in this case Brew York's Tonkoko Milk Stout, divine stuff), and the curtain comes down with a Birmingham nightcap within very close range of New Street Station. Dig Brew have set up a Beer Club outlet in one of the Piccadilly Arcade units, hence we round off with a sour special that looks something akin to souped-up tomato juice. Cheers!

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