Sunday, December 21

A Hub Marketing Christmas

'Twas a week before Christmas, and all round the hubs, Board members sought cafes, canals, closets and pubs... Yes, Thursday 18th December was designated as the Hub Marketing Board's official 2014 Christmas caper, with Charles Pemberton-Rowbottom III due to make a guest appearance at the annual Hub Awards ceremony. Here comes the tale of the trip!

- J. Houghton Ltd in Handsworth -
Handsworth has opening honours for this particular outing, a swish new Midland Metro tram dropping us at Winson Green Outer Circle stop for a walk up Nineveh Road. The backstreets here have lots of goodies for us to unwrap, such as the Handsworth Central Club, Ashwin Tunnel underpass and the corner electrical store of J. Houghton Ltd.

- Stafford Road Closet? -
Emerging onto the Soho Road, we are drawn towards the Handsworth Campus of South & City College with its grand facade and clock tower. One of the outbuildings particularly catches our eye, and following closer inspection the Chairman declares it as an old closet, the key detailing being the windows and some patterned tiling on the worn doorsteps - cue the customary pose...

- A Different Take on D9 Driving! -
Grove Lane leads us around towards Handsworth Park, passing the local Grammar School and a soggy sofa where the Chairman can momentarily rest his legs. Mr D9 doesn't have to wait long for some driving action, although a wobbly jeep in the park's play area was quite a departure from his usual bus antics.

- Handsworth Cricket Club -
Handsworth Park is also home to Handsworth Leisure Centre, an ornate bandstand, a couple of scenic pools and a cricket pitch so there is plenty keeping the Secretary's camera occupied. The park is bisected by a railway line so although we didn't see any old closets on this occasion it might be worth having another look in future.

- Cafe and Calendar -
That preliminary piece of ferreting means we are now ready for breakfast and a long-awaited visit to a place that first came to our attention during the North Birmingham outing back in May. Stan's Cafe with its Pepsi signage needed to be sampled where besides egg and bacon the cafe was also the setting for the day's first official ceremony, the unveiling of the 2015 Hub Marketing calendar. Excellent!

- Benefits Street Baldness -
Catching the 11A Outer Circle just outside the Handsworth Horticultural Institute we wend our way to Winson Green, the Chairman making the call to alight just before the local prison. D9 has a television filming location in mind, this being James Turner Street which found its way onto the nation's screens courtesy of the 'Benefits Street' series on Channel 4. There wasn't any sign of White Dee or Black Dee today but at least the street has now been immortalised with its very own bald spot!

- Prison Break at Winson Green -
The Chairman adopted a more conventional pose outside the prison gates, and it was only on later inspection that we realised the photo made it look like he'd just been released with his belongings tucked under his arm. The drama of the jailbreak may explain why we missed spotting an important nearby feature (more about that in a bit) although the Old Smithy and Aberdeen Street did attract our attention.

- Hockley Port Junction -
The next stage of our merry mission was to explore the Soho Loop, a fascinating section of the original Old Birmingham Main Line Canal. Snaking around the edges of City Hospital, the loop provides access to Hockley Port Junction where the Soho Branch now comprises residential moorings. The prison walls soon loom large once more, as does the asylum frontage of the former All Saints Hospital.

- The Winson Green Closet -
Approaching Winson Green Road Bridge, we spot a mysterious brick hut up above and decide to take a closer look. Through a hole in the brickwork we can see the telltale tiles and marble of old urinals that confirm another closet discovery, this being all the more remarkable given we'd walked straight past the building earlier without batting an eyelid!

- Soho Foundry and Tavern -
Back on the towpath trail, we proceed to Winson Green Junction where we join the Main Line Canal in the shadow of Soho train maintenance depot. There are traces of old industrial arms and inlets as we reach Avery Rail Bridge, from where a shortcut path brings us out by the entrance to Soho Foundry, a factory that was to be instrumental in the industrial revolution after being originated by Matthew Boulton and James Watt in 1795. Across the road is the Soho Foundry Tavern where we exchange legs of darts over a well-earned pint of M&B Mild.

- A Smethwick West Spot -
Mr D9 is in his element now, taking a stroll down memory lane when the New Navigation summons up thoughts of Christmas 1986, Status Quo, Springfield Bitter and pick-up trucks. Brasshouse Lane leads to our final canal section of the day, Galton Tunnel being a concrete tube below Telford Way. After a homage to Smethwick West station, the Chairman engages full sleeve-seeking mode with the St Paul's Road Good Cheers Cellars off licence (sadly with new signs recently installed) and the Oldbury Cemetery closet.

- Cheers in the Old Cross -
All this adventure and we'd still only done one pub, so from Rood End we momentarily muse on the Merrivale closet (D9 is now expert at avoiding manhole accidents here) before pitching into Langley. The Royal Oak is a traditional corner M&B pub where we can rest after much walking, while across the road the Old Cross (backing onto Langley Library) is handy for a half as darkness begins to descend. 

- Safe-cracking Santa -
With D9 in charge of directions, the 'Londonderry Hub' gets an evening airing although a daytime shot may be required to do the location full marketing justice. Some nifty navigation gets us to the Hollybush, a red brick M&B pub not far from Smethwick Cricket Club. We need a darts decider so the Secretary gets in the groove to rack up another victory, then its over to Bearwood where Charles Pemberton-Rowbottom III takes to the stage at the Midland and announces the award winners from the last twelve months. For D9 though, his brush with Winson Green Prison earlier hadn't put him off a life of crime judging by his attempts to crack the combination on an old Chubb safe - the Santa hat was no disguise!

- Pepsi Sign at Waterloo Fish & Chip Shop -
We hoped for a bit of a Barrel bash when catching the 82 to Cape Hill but it wasn't to be, although consolation comes from the lovely old Pepsi sign outside the Waterloo Fish & Chip Shop. Stocking up on chips, there's time for an encounter with the Puffing Billy on Raglan Road before we round off in West Bromwich with an Oakdale nightcap, our hub happenings complete for another year.

- A Merry Marketing Christmas -
And finally... an awards summary from the presentation at the Midland. With nominations submitted and spreadsheets duly studied, we can declare the following winners: 'Cafe of the Year' goes to Pype Hayes as a proper trucker's greasy spoon, the cafe also being the location for 'Bald Spot of the Year'; 'Sleeve of the Year' was Riley Square in Coventry; 'Discount of the Year' was the Heathway in Buckland End, 'Dive of the Year' the Coventry Cross. With that, it's a very Merry Christmas from the Hub Marketing Board, and we look forward to more adventurous antics in 2015.

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