Sunday, November 4

D9 Does North Wolverhampton

Viewers longing for the latest episode of the D9 costume dramas need wait no more, for Friday 2nd November sees the Anti-Hub Marketing Board reconvening for another session of Wolverhampton area scrutiny. This time the Secretary’s North Wolverhampton home patch would provide the setting whilst the Chairman was of course on hand to summon up various moments of madcap attire...

WOLVERHAMPTON: The screening is scheduled for 1230 hours but it is nearly 1300 before the Chairman graces the set, and the meter is definitely ticking pending his arrival. Compensatory cobs for lateness are an established contractual clause now and so production moves to the Lych Gate Tavern, although at only 50p each the Secretary might need to think of a more hard-hitting punishment. The Chairman then gets chance to add to his subway collection, although the shock emergence of a West Bromwich Albion supporters card could have had cliffhanger consequences at the Wanderer.



- Dusters ready in The Moreton -

FORDHOUSES: luckily we always aim to be a family show, and being as the Secretary could not find a pair of scissors, the Chairman and his Baggies card made it onto the number 3 completely intact. Recalling the days when this was the 503 route, we enjoy a ride up to Fordhouses to alight outside what used to be Lucas Aerospace, the factory having had quite a few different guises since. Across the road is the Moreton Arms where the Chairman makes his first scheduled costume change, digging out the dusters once more. Thankfully the yellow cloths did not make an appearance at the Harrowby, although D9 did repeat his trick of accidentally wandering into the ladies toilet – this action wasn’t in the script but he seems to be ad-libbing similar instances with increasing regularity.


- Harrowby Hub Protest -

LOW HILL: next up comes a ride on a virtually empty 25, taking the show but a short distance from Wobaston to Showell Circus. Here D9 enters into a dream sequence, hunting around for some mythical public toilets that he thought were located around the back of the shops. Back to reality and the Secretary had heard that the Bushbury Arms might be at risk of closure, so this landmark 1930’s Mitchells & Butlers boozer definitely required inclusion. Chairman D9 was very impressed when his round of M&B Mild came in at £2.10 - one for the long-running spreadsheet storyline or so he thought - and the pub made quite an impression with its motley collection of regulars and a memorable outdoor smoking area. ‘The Bush’ might not be the greatest pub in Wolverhampton but it will be a loss to the area if it does shut.


- In the Bushbury Arms -

WOOD END: with the action now moving towards Wednesfield, the Chairman’s bladder made its customary presence felt, so it was his own fault that we had to nip into the Red Lion. D9 soon regretted this development when the Secretary’s round was a mere £1.99, snatching back the spreadsheet saga honours before the Chairman could even say Microsoft Excel. As the crew made tracks for Wood End, it was the green neon lighting of the Noahs Ark that proved most tempting for our next bit of location work, although a bonus Banks’s half could not persuade the bald spot to make an unexpected appearance.

ASHMORE PARK: darkness has descended but there is still some final filming to do as we cut quickly to Ashmore Park. The 28 suffices for a short hop into the estate as the Chairman reminisces about the old 527 and 528 circular routes - the current incumbent is merely a link between Wolverhampton, New Cross Hospital and Willenhall. Snape Road provides the chance for the Secretary to steal the scene with another of his infamous sleeve finds, whereby the True Briton allows for some time travel as we admire some of the original 1960’s features.


WOLVERHAMPTON:  most good dramas involve some chase or another, so a dynamic dash down the Cannock Road built the suspense as we hoped for a bus back to Wolverhampton. Just when the situation looked critical, the 11 came riding to the rescue with the Chairman recalling his own experiences of driving the 511 around Underhill back in a previous series. The ‘Tram Waiting Room’ is our closing set for some last minute D9 duster drapery, and the credits start to roll when the Midland Metro takes the Chairman off into the night. Goodness knows what costume changes he’ll work into the script next time… 

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